Friday, December 01, 2006

Just call me Scrooge

So at work, my office sponsors a family for the holidays. Since I am so grateful for what I have, and I often suffer from guilt complexes when I see someone scouring through their plastic bag of change to buy a measly sandwich or ride the bus, I thought I would participate.

So, I was flipping through the gift ideas and saw things like: towels, lotion, baby toys, baby clothes, grocery store gift certificates, underwear, socks, and other mundane items. The gift items were all things I can just go out and buy, much less have to ask for at Christmas. I steered away from the baby related items for obvious reasons, but I did not think anything on the list was too extravagant. Finally I selected bath towels for the mom. I though I would by her something really nice, perhaps from a nice department store or something. It tugged at my heart strings that she would have to get bath towels for a present and I noticed all the items for her were really just household items for the family.

Then I went back to my office and read the e-mail to get the details of wrapping and deadlines and all that jazz. Here is the information about the family:

Family Information:

My 18-year-old son just had two kids; a boy 2 ½ months and a girl 2 months. We have the children every week from Thursday-Saturday, but we have very little supplies and baby things. We’re in desperate need of baby items so the babies needs can be met. My son is currently a senior in high school and is looking for a job.

Notice anything funny about this? No, I am not talking about the misuse of the word little. The 18 year old son has a 2 and 2 1/2 month old for starters. That means he got 2 different people knocked up. Hmmm... I think that changes the way I feel about buying them something. I know I am evil but why should infertile me have to help out other non-infertiles that obviously made really stupid decisions in their lives. Yes, it is about the children and they should not have had to suffer. Although, those babies could have at least been put up for adoption so people like me and YOU could be parents. (Oh, that's right the laws in this country are crap for b-parents so the babies would be placed with us and then taken back after a while.) Yes, I understand the complexity of these statement. I am a very empathetic person, in fact I worked in welfare to work for 5 years and I know some things are shit luck and others just stupidity. Most often stupidity prevails.

Why does everything have to relate back to my infertility? I guess I am no longer in the Christmas spirit.


My Reality said...

I think I can challenge you for this title too. I am so not in the Christmas spirit this year. I don't want to spend any money that can go towards my drugs for my next cycle and everyone else has kids. So, I guess I feel your pain with this.

DD said...

And how tempting would it be to make some veiled offer to take one or both babes off their hands?

I would have a very hard time feeling the xmas spirit on this one as well.

Lut said...

YOU do not need to go baby shopping. No way. If you can't live with yourself without contributing, get them a gift certificate. Or have a colleague get one for you.

I don't go baby shopping for my friends, fertile or otherwise. I refuse. Wiring money, which is standard practice nowadays, no problem.

not so fertile girl said...

Your not a Scrooge. It is hard to shop for babies (just had to and I thought it was somewhat heart breaking) and especially when the parent is how should we say...haphazard with their reproduction ability. (reminds me of my druggie sister) There are other ways you could help folks out this Christmas Season. Work at a food shelf or shelter...invite a person that doesn't have family over for your Christmas celebration. Just some ideas.
Merry Christmas! is it too early to say that? :)