Gonna enjoy it while I can....

I am only a few days past transfer I can not stop obsessing that our embryos were only 4 and 5 cells at time of 3 day transfer. I have googled it, read reports and am just going to try to not think about it much until I can test next week. I really wish they would have had a few more cells so I would not have this to obsess over my entire 2ww, but at the same time I should just be grateful we got this far. To add to my craziness - I am still concerned that I am going to dislodge them or prevent them for implanting even though I have read a zillion reports that state this is not possible.

In the meantime, DH defended his PhD today and we celebrated with his family. We went over to the inlaws for a drink and immediately upon walking in the door my FIL handed me a glass of Crystal Regal (sp?) non-alcoholic and said "we got this for you since you can't have alcohol". At the restaurant I ordered a salad with beets and chevre chaud and my SIL spouted off about how I should not eat the cheese. FIL would not even let me have a sip of his beer and it smelled so good - like chocolate. Not to mention, DH was having a brie sandwich for lunch and I asked him to make me one (I took the nurses advise to stay in bed / couch and order him around on ET day) and he refused. Normally I would be HUGELY annoyed that these people are telling me what to do and being a little crazy, but instead it made me feel kind of good. I remember feeling this way only once before - before I miscarried a few years ago.

Now, technically, I am not even pg. Heck, the little ones may not have even implanted yet, but in my mind I am going to go with it until I find out otherwise. Is that just pathetic? I want SO badly to be pregnant that I am going to act like I am already?

I have decided that I am just gonna enjoy it while I can because that is what I need to do today.